What makes me feel like a kid and want to tell my story to U all daily? Since I will retire soon I thought about it a lot on my morning walk in this very cold day. I thought that I am lucky and it is a privilege that I was able to do few things which I wanted to do (having a college education in spite of having three children and married at age 18, working in medical field which I wished to do and help people, able to buy stuff which I need, having children who are self-motivated to do well at school). Of course that goes without saying that I have a husband and fy who has accepted me as I am! I often celebrated each phase of my life and be present in it than mourn something that is passed or don’t have. “Life is like an onion: You peel it off one layer at a time, and sometimes you weep. I have a simple philosophy: Fill what’s empty if you can. Empty what’s full, U don’t want. Scratch where it itches. I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way she or he handles these three things: a rainy and windy day, lost luggage at the airport and tangled Christmas tree lights. Enjoy the hump day and the song I chose for U all today.
It’s
Election Day. The 2020 races are dominating headlines, but it’s important to
vote today in local and state elections. This morning my husband reminded me that
our voting booth has changed and I must go to the correct place. I thought how
much he cares to let me know small thing like this, which is important to me.
Many of my friends here often asked me how we deal with our arranged marriage
and how it works. I don’t have any specific answer for them since all most
everybody did that in my time at India. I tell them that we care for each other
and learn to convert our care into love with time. While walking I thought it
is true that he does care for me and our family a lot like many people. That is
the glue to our long marriage and my willingness to stay married to him when I
come back to this earth again since I believe in recantation as per my Hindu
religious belief. So for me caring and respecting the person is an important
element in marriage than having any other material.
My ability to tell a story is what excites me to write about people and places. I now wish to write the story that I see in my head about dear Shanti Apa and Sri Gopal babu, friends that I know from Canada. I was happy and excited when I called and asked them whether I can write a few lines about them in social media. I can’t describe my joyous feelings when they both agreed for me to go ahead with my story. I was excited and could not wait to get started. The first thing came to my mind that they really bring the best in people, no matter how old and where they are from. They both know the art of passing down information, knowledge and wisdom in creative ways. With their selfless work they have helped to construct and shape our Odissi dance in North America when we did not have many dancers or media like now a days.
Sri Gopal babu has often talked about how we can improve our
small community and never mentions the negative side of what we did not or
could not do right. I guess this is the reason why I often wish secretly that I
should have been in Canada, which might have brought my creative side of
wanting to act in plays and dramas. With his persistence effort we now have a
yearly drama competition in North America. He started the Odissi dance in North
America and the first Odisha society in Canada.
She will sing this for our Srigopal babu
If i get a chance and requested to sing for them I will sing this song (think the girl as the younger version of Chandra) for both of them with pride and joy.
Shanti Apa is the model wife and mother every man or child can aspire. Although highly educated, she spends most of her time working behind the scene to fulfill Sri Gopal babu’s love for promoting Odia culture in North America. Seeing Shanit apa I wish to be like her a little bit in many ways. She is proficient in all kinds of Odia and western culinary. My family had the good luck of being with them few times and I remember the food and hospitality she extended to us, although they did not know us well at that time. She is also an expert in dressing children for drama and dance. Most of the outfits were made with her direction or by her since the appropriate costumes were not available at that time (unlike now). Sri Gopal babu is a perfectionist and that makes her job twice hard but she always did it without any complain.
Their daughter Rini
We are very fortunate that their daughter Niharika Mohanty (Rini)
stays in USA and is the founder, Director, CEO of Guru Shradha dance Academy at
California. Someday I hope to write something about our talented second
generation Rini if she gives me an opportunity. Enjoy my post and know that we are blessed to have such talented and
kind people among us in North America.
Dr. Arjun (Gaeen menas brother in law) and Padmini (Nani means older sister) Purohit now
song he sings for her
The art of storytelling or passing down information and knowledge in creative ways helps me to construct my thoughts. It is a process of using facts and narrative to communicate something for which I am passionate about. I like to write about people (with their permission) using facts and my imagination. Sometimes if I don’t have facts I just close my eyes and think about the person. Then whatever good thoughts I feel I pen it quickly. Recently I have tried to add songs to convey more information and complement the writing. I also add photographs to my posts. They say a picture is worth thousand words which saves me when I can’t think much about the matter. For a story to work it needs for me to select, condense, and organize the facts. At the same time my imagination must embroider on them, filling in the spaces, finding what is unknown within the known, which is exactly what I seem to do by using the limited knowledge and information I have about the theme. When I was on the telephone with Dr. Purohit, whom I often address as Gaeen (brother in law), he told me not to worry about facts but write from my heart and the way I feel. So here is my scattered thoughts about him and his beautiful wife Padmini (I call her nani, which means big sister).
Nani and Gaeen when they were younger
He lives at Kingston in Canada and was the chief Psychologist in a children’s hospital in that city. It is not an easy job to be the chief psychologist in any hospital. I have heard that they help any new Odia, Indian or immigrant people that arrive in Kingston area. Dr. Purohit is passionate about the issue of “Koshala” which is important to him and obviously he is trying to convince us with numerous posts about why it should be the way he thinks. He also practices Buddhist religion and helped me and many others when we have questions about life, love and other issues. I was proud when I saw him perform as an interracial priest at Somia’s wedding. The sermon was beautiful and the words still linger in my ears. He is licensed to be a priest. Most of all I admire and like his full moon smile. He makes me and my family as his own even though we have met him only a few times. That is the personality he has, which charms all young and old people, specially a talkative sister in law like me. Ha, ha.
On the other hand Padmini nani is very different. I can compare her beauty with the famous Bollywood actress “Madhubala”. She is very quick in what she does. Only she can handle her husband’s demand, who calls her 10 times in 15 minutes to find things. Like the girls at her time Nani married young and came to Canada with Gaeen. She put herself thru school here while having three children, just like some of us did at that time. She chose to help the elderly and became a nursing assistant, which is a demanding job physically and mentally. Take it from me (a nurse) who knows it first-hand. I believe it is the beauty, spontaneity and the sweet simplicity of Padmini nani conveyed to Dr. Purohit all he needed to know about her to make her his life partner.
Dr. Purohit performing wedding ceremony of Somia and Joran.
Finally I thank Dr. Purohit (Gaeen) to give me the opportunity to pen my thoughts. Enjoy my post and know that we are blessed to have such people among us in North America. Ty Somia for supplying the photograph from yr wedding where Dr. Purohit was the priest.
My writing is from my scattered thoughts, but often come accompanied by my experience about who we are. This is about a mother who feels when her son is young and older and tries to make things better for her child.
It sure was a gift to have my son Sanjay, born here (in the USA) after a long time. We had two children born in India and then we migrated to the USA. I was only 20 yr. old and had two children. When I got pregnant with Sanjay, I was mature enough to know what motherhood means and how much work is involved to be a mom without the support of my extended family. I had family members to help me when my two older children were born.
I felt love and pride in having Sanjay born here. At the same time, I was fearful of Sanjay growing up as a brown boy. It always compelled me to think about how his life will be here. As a first-generation immigrant mother, I struggled with the thought of just how much he will face the ugliness and unfairness that is encountered by many young children because of their color. I was also joyful thinking of the opportunity he would have grown up here. In public school, he can play any sports and take music lessons free as a boy. No need to be born rich to have all these extra activities like in India when we were growing up. So I hoped for the best and kept exposing him to various activities like playing sports and taking part in the orchestra with the study.
I trusted that everything will be O.K if I can just do my best and tell him about his heritage. I tried to tell him the reason we migrated to this vibrant land and kept an intact, loving family around him. I have always used the art of storytelling or passing down information, knowledge, and wisdom in creative ways that helped him to know about our heritage, culture, and the country where we came from. I have used stories to pass on knowledge and advice on how to live an honest and better life. It reminds me of a story I used to tell him when he played the position of goalkeeper in soccer (football in the rest of the world) from the age of 4 till he was in high school. When little Sanjay started playing, he often asked me who I know played goalkeeper position as an example. I never played or saw many sports growing up back home. I had no one but to pull out the names from our mythology character dear monkey God Hanuman and Bhimsen. Hanuman is the supreme keeper who saved many obstacles from difficult situations in our Hindu scripture and always remains strong with his hand as the goalkeeper must in a soccer game. Somehow Sanjay liked my story and always prayed to Hanuman before he starts at the goal post in a game.
Bhimsen is a character in our scripture Mahabharat who is well known for his passion. He was big and strong as a child and an adult. He was passionate about food. He often found a way to reach out to the food even in darkness. His hands used to reach where the food was kept even in darkness. I told the story to Sanjay how Lord Bhimsen could find food in dark without light in the dark kitchen. So the key for him was to do things where he has passion and it will be easily done. This way he will do things with joy rather than being compelled to do.. We also talked to be strong by eating all food and stay calm as Lord Hanuman used to do. He remained calm and used to jump to catch the ball like our monkey God. I don’t know but as a mother, I felt good that I was able to answer his questions from my resource.
I also sang a lullaby to him and talked about our extended family. Often I described where we are from and told him about our big family. How we all live together in an extended family enjoying aunts, uncles besides parents. One popular lullaby was Oh, moon uncle you come and play ball with my son here since he has no uncle, aunt in our migrated country to play with.
I enjoy writing this story from my memory and wish my son good luck whatever he opts to do in his life.
Sanjay at the goal post. When the boys jump on him I prayed to Lord Hanuman to come and assist. Ha, ha.
As I promised I took Nina to bank this morning so she can finish some work. She just needed me to drive her but did all the talking and decision how to invest her money where by herself. I was in awe seeing her poise, knowledge and the way she handled her conversation with the bank manager. Nobody will know that she never went beyond primary school that to in Poland. While coming back we discussed what is the meaning her name and my name. I also let her listen to the song and told her the story how I chopped up my name to Chandra after I listen to this song. Here is a post for U all today and few lines from our conversation.
I told her that Nina is a Hindi name meaning “pretty eyes.” …and the name of a Babylonian goddess. …and a nickname for names ending in -nina, like Antonina and Penina.My original name Chandramani generally means Moonstone or Jewel, is of Sanskrit, Indian origin, Name Chandramani is a Feminine (or Girl) name. Person with name Chandramani are mainly Hindu by religion.
We both laughed and said that now of course “I am simply Chandra!!!!!” I read her the translation of the poem from Odia to English which a kind friend did for me. Enjoy it as we both did while driving back to her nursing home.
Nadira nama alasakanyA..
————————— A river named shy Damsel…
nadira nama alasakanya
tirara nama tandra
gramara nama swapnapuri
priyara nama chandra
priyara nama chandra…
nadira nama alasakanya…
******** By a river named shy damsel
(Flowing)
with sides of swooning beauty
living
in the riparian village of Dreamland
Beloved
named Chandra…
********
aakhira nama shaamuka tara
luhara nama muktaa
premara nama padmamadhu
biraha nama riktaa
tara irsha nama prabhanjana
anurage se bhadra
gramara nama swapnapuri
priyara nama chandra…
******** Her eyes are like shelled mollusk
which
flows the tears like pearl
Her
love is like honey from lotus
and
bereft of that feels like emptiness all around
Her
jealousy is fleeting (like wind)
In
affection she is a blessing
********
prathama chuaan kadamba phula
kathara nama bansi
bepathu nama patrajhara
mana ta banahansi
tara lajara nama krushnachuda
chumbana ta nidra
gramara nama swapnapuri
priyara nama chandra…
******** Her Maiden touch is like that of Kadamba
(flower)
My friend for the last 30 years, Nina whom I love a lot.
No matter when I go I see her bedroom this way. Always simple but clean. She does all her work by herself for FYI.
Her chest where she keeps her stuff which is small but very impeccable.
Here is looking at you Nina. Few hours with her and time for me to say good bye as we hugged.
My best friend is the one who brings out the best in me. Good friends help you to find important things when you have lost them…your smile, your hope, and your courage.”
Yesterday I opted to spend some time around a nursing home where my friend Nina lives now. Nina is a 95-year-old beautiful lady who is a war victim during the world war ll. She was from Poland. Some 30 years back I met Nina at YMCA where I was taking exercise class. Her outgoing nature and full moon smile made me to become her friend immediately and we started talking about life, family and other small things during our exercise. I came to know that she had no children but she loved little children. I had my son Sanjay at that time and Nina just loved him a lot. Since then she has come to my home for Thanks Giving dinners and attended my daughter’s wedding and Sanjay’s birthday party. I have taken her to stores, doctor’s office grocery shopping when she needed. If my mother was alive she would have same age as Nina but I consider each other as friends rather than making her my aunt like most Indian people do when they meet someone older than them. As per her, the kindest thing I have done is to call upon her monthly and we spend some time together either talking, walking or shopping. She often waits for me eagerly
I have seen
many changes with her within last 30 years. She has down sized her home and
moved to a nursing home. I would say that although she has no formal education
she is a smart lady. She takes care of her health, finance and drove till she
was 90-years-old. Her place is always very organized and clean. I have learnt
from her to take risks, explore the world, develop mind and do a job which we like.
Physical appearance is important to her and she exercise daily and takes good
care of her body and mind. She has perfect straight teeth at her age which is
amazing.
I always return home with lot of
happiness when I visit her. She reminds me to cherish my body and soul which
can sail us through the adventure which is life. As per her if the ship is
broken we are not going anywhere. Keeping to maintain good health, I signed up
for my Zumba class (form of dance ) hoping to enjoy and get pleasure. Please see
the caption and get a glimpse of her life thru today’s post.
The sky looked very pretty on my Birth Day.I t seemed as if it is welcoming me with open arm and saying now it is my turn. Every Sunday few of us get together at the local park and do our yoga practice. There was no exception for me today. The blue mat was mine when I got up to take the photo for U all. One of my special friend said everything what this flowers say. Just to look at the nature and enjoy. It conveys to feel the feeling. Just the way I feel wind inside and outside of my body and soul,. The feeling was like touch of soft breeze from Puri sea beach where I am from.
Someone asked where I will go for breakfast, lunch or dinner. No going out for me since I love to cook at home for my family. I made my famous omelette and we three (my husband, my daughter and me) enjoyed breakfast. Not sure about lunch but for sure dinner will be made by no one but my husband who is a great cook and I have learnt most of my cooking from him.
A card from my dear daughter and her family always makes me feel rich in love. My children are my strength. They are my teachers, advisers and friend. I have learnt so much from them about sports, life and how to have fun in spite of adversity. The special love comes when my gran daughter makes me food to eat or knit scarf for her Aai. It is always a pleasure to have my son in law around and I am blessed with his love for us since 1997.
A birthday celebration within your dream is a positive omen. … Dreaming of a birthday foretells a calm period in your life. It is a good dream letting you know that you will enjoy a time of good health and a life of ease. I heard that dreaming of your birth day omeans good fortune is coming your way. I have been thinking about my BD since I may opt to retire from my job this year. Yesterday before my BD when I was sleeping I had this dream that I was in a big auditorium enjoying the Beatles concert. All of a sudden I heard my alaram went off and I told myself, please not now. Here is the song I was enjoying:
Early morning on my BD. The sun is smiling at me and so also my fy and friends who wished me Happy BD. Please see caption for each photo. I have to post for you all what #Moonmoon wrote for me here, for U all my fy and friends. “A toast to your never ending agility, childlike zeal and endeavor, vivacity, diva like never say die attitude, fun loving persona and of course a dreams are made of type success story!!”may you keep on entertaining and enthralling us all our lives, you have already achieved so much but may the blonde in a red dress with high heels keep on smiling at me from the cover when I read her autobiography!!!” I truly believe every word she says and never shy away to work hard or to try anything new. Having fun is a must in my list of things to do. Enjoy the song I chose for myself. All my good luck would not have been possible if I would not married to my husband who always respected me as equal partner and allowed me to be myself which is nothing but enjoying life in a lively, lighthearted way.
Yesterday in a gathering one of my friends asked me, if I had an arranged marriage? My answer to her was, yes and we are now married for 50 years. Her question kept me thinking and made me post this today: An arranged marriage is a type of marital union where the bride and groom are selected by individuals other than the couple themselves, particularly by family members such as the parents. In some cultures, a professional matchmaker may be used to find a spouse for a young person. Arranged marriages have historically been prominent in many cultures. The practice remains common in many regions, notably South Asia, though in many other parts of the world the practice has declined substantially during the 19th and 20th centuries.
My
parents and family made the match for me and at that time this was the way
marriages happened in India. We had limited help from our extended family. We’ve
grown old together now, seen each other like friends amidst plenty of ups and downs…I’m
grateful to our families for bestowing me with a life partner who has supported
me through thick and thin. He has ensured that I pursued my dreams, with him by
my side. Posting for you all a photo of two trees in a background where the
trees are grown together in nature side by side and thrive. It was not a match
made in heaven, but as you know, “opposites attract” and the rest is
history!!!
Sarita (Kuni) is an Indian feminine given name meaning “a
river”. It is also one of the many names of the Hindu goddess Durga who is the
stronges among all God and Goddess. Since she is the youngest child in my
sister’s house we all called her as “Kuni” the lttle girl. While walking today
I tried to concentrate my thoughts on Kuni my niece. She is a gift whose worth
can’t be measured except by the feelings in my heart. I came to know her ever
since she was born since I used to visit my sister in summer and other time.
As time passed
I saw her more since I married her uncle. Our bond became more strong since I
became Khudi as well as mausi. We spent lots of good and bad time together.
I often felt her caring nature and how much she does when I visit my
sister’s home (her mom’s home). She has travelled even 6x back and forth from
her house to my sister’s home just to make sure that I am doing O.K and have
everything as I need. I feel very fortunate to have my nephew; nieces make me
feel so loved. She is a little bit of my childhood that is never lost no matter
where I live or how old I am. I am dedicating two songs for her today because
she is related 2x to me. She is the youngest and the best. So one song
dedicated for her being a child and the other one as she grew up. Please enjoy.
